To feel. To feel is not easy when we are trapped in  pre-concepts and pre-thoughts and multiple layers of desires. I am so taken by what I think I have to do at each moment, situation, age, that I am living with a straitjacket on. I am blind to reality. I cannot experience reality, I live in a parallel world that doesn’t connect with what is really happening, I am asleep in grey-land. I just act with a programmed set of responses created by my ego, and for some reason I think I am free. And I even call that action  free will! Sometimes I have that strange opportunity of being advised by a wise friend or teacher, or by a good book that fall into my hands, and even if I am free to take the advise I  chose not to do so. Why? I ask myself… why do I have a strong pulse on the opposite way? My ego again, my small petty desires of self instant gratification. To be able to take an advise I have to be able to feel it deeply  and make it mine. If I am blindly “obeying” an advise, as if I was tamed , it doesn’t work, even if we take it and follow it in a perfect way, it doesn’t work if I don’t feel it deeply. Theory is only good if I can live it and transform it into my life.  Last night I  was lucky enough to take the wrong way and instead of getting crushed life gave me the opportunity of seeing in front of me , as if they were alive, all the reasons why that wasn’t the correct choice for me. I was given the opportunity to see the negative feelings that choice was bringing into my life, all those feelings were put in front of me like marching in a parade.  I could see them with a body literally marching in a line in front of my eyes, in a very Hollywood way. I’m so dramatic! Life  is giving me that strange opportunity of graphically seeing in action how I just turned in the wrong curb! and how to come back to where I started and take the right turn next time I’m put in the same situation. My experince last night gave me the unique opportunity of putting together a good advise with my deep realization of my negative pulse. If I am  lucky enough,  to have a new opportunity to choose in the same turning point I will now turn in the correct curb. Nobody but I, is responsible of my choices and the advises I follow. Only I can make the shift to joy and change my present to eternity! LIONE & CROFT

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